6:30am: a call from my manager to let me know he was running late and so I would have to wait outside since he had the keys to the building. I thought "shit, it's gonna be one of those days". It was.
7:30am: Heaved in to work, the door was open, a stranger was sitting in there playing on his laptop. I waved hello and went on to start the day. Five minutes later, the manager arrived and started swearing because he's been stitched up(un)intentionally by his superior. he didn't have to get up early after all or even ring me. Why was he using me as a sounding board?!
9:00am: Work gets of to a rather slow start and of course (nasty) manager is in his element. It seems he has been demoted, a point I unthinkingly and blunty pointed out when he ranted on about how he is being moved to the new premises in August, that he wont be a "duty" manager anymore but rather a supervisor, supervising his own little section and training others. Myself and another colleague, in unison said "so what will you do when they are trained?". He seemed bewildered by that but he truly believes it's a step up. I rather think he's in denial and it's a coping mechanism.
10:00: He insists on sending me on a break, a sweet Italian colleague begs him in Italian not to do so as I'd have to endure 7 more hours of standing, hardly moving and not getting a deserved break. Like the bastard and sadist he is, he refuses. I feel myself close to snapping and I just walk out. I am back in 20minutes (as stipulated by government) minus the the pay (unstipulated by the government but endorsed by the company). I spend the next 30 minutes in a huff.
11:30: I get a rather difficult customer who insists on telling me how to do my job. No, she rather thinks she knows my job. She doesn't she is a customer. I tell her i shall oblige just to make her happy however...
She sees the folly of her ways, her ears burn and she apologises profusely. She knows she is in the worng, I know it but at this point I am close to breaking point.I don't care about the apology. Half an hour later, there is a miscommunication about orders between myself and my self-appointed advocate. I look confused. I actually become confused. She asks me what I am doing. For some odd reason, I feel humiliated. She is only 19yrs. She asked "what are you doing?" three times. That gets to me.I feel like crying but I hold it together.
I tell her I am going to the back for a bit and I lock myself in a toilet cubicle and try to breath slowly. I tell myself it's only a job. I am responsible for my own feelings. Soon I go back. I can't hide forever. One colleague tries to tease me, it rubs me up the wrong way and I punch him in the chest. He is rock-hard so that has no effect
. I slap his bum instead but i rather think he enjoys it so I give up
My advocate says she doesn't like to see me sad, I guess i wear my feelings on my face literally. I am trying hard to work out why I am so upset. I come up with a few theories. Old stuff really. Then I latch on to the idea it might be PMT. It's not. I am ovulating(i think) so I should be horny not mopey
. I can't wait for 5pm to come.
1:00pm: A text from my flatmate telling me he's been made MBE as part of the queens birthday celebration. I am astounded! If only they awarded things like that for being considerate, paying your share of the bills on time and cleaning the bloody toilet, I think to myself!. I chuckle inwardly. He is obviously chuffed and needs approval. I sense he texted everyone in his mobile directory. I duly reply enthusiastically and congratulate him.It's an honour afterall right?!
He replies and says we'll celebrate and sends a a kiss. This baffles me a bit but never mind:b
4:00pm: I have survived, still got an hour to go. I don't bother to ask to leave early. The place would fall apart. In any case I think my little almost-break-down has subsided for the moment. It quietens down a bit, i chat with another colleague who has just arrived. Nasty comes to say goodbye, I wave him off and busy myself.
5:00pm: I am done. The inexplicable day from hell is over. I decide to have a Nandos on the south bank.They won't give me a cider to go. I am not bothered. A girl who quit last week sends a text to come to her house for a little party. I missed her farewell drinks, I don't particulalry wanna go home, she's is only in canary Wharf so i respond and say yes. I get 4 cans of beer from Sainsbury's, meet one of her Uni friends while we are searching for her flat. She is terribly bad at giving directions and refuses to come down to collect us. Fury wells up inside me...again, but i calm down enough to smile when we (eventually) enter the flat.
Interesting mix of people. Three offer me pot almost immediately. I refuse. They refuse to believe I don't smoke it. I have beer with the japanese girl(the one I arrived with), we have another one and then one more. I start dancing. the music is good.We chat generally, I start to laugh and enjoy myself. They ask about work, i give them a look. They get it. They understand I am glad I haven't spoken to anyone on the phone. Couldn't bear to.
Eventually I check my watch. It's 23h00. Time to dash, i brook no arguments. We manage to catch the last westbound tube and I arrive home, brush my teeth, drink water and sleep.
I had a meeting this morning. It went well. I still feel a bit morose but I am ok