I started reading rithompson's blog then realised someone had tagged her. All you had to do was go to "next blog" at the top of the page and see how far you go and whether you see any of your friends blogs. I stopped when i came back to Ros. What a trip though. I read blogs I hadn't read before all on very important and ratherdepressing topics:human oppressionin Burma and Tibet, selling organs in the black market, and some hilarious ones on England's exit form the world cup. The thread lead me to 4 friends and eventually back to to where i started. Randomly reading blogs has its advantages i suppose.
I am awaiting my exam results tomorrow. actually I could find out right after midnight if i log on to the net today. I'm not sure i want to though
. I am almost certain I failed. My fault, late dissertation, lack of motivation, blah, blah. No excuse really. But wouldn't it be wonderful for me to type in my student number, look on the results page and find just one word there:PASS? I really don't care if it's 50% or more. just a pass. Alas, i can but only dream
I was bullied by a manger yesterday and i told him point blank that he is a bully. in fact my word were "Ah.. you are a bully. You are a fucking bully". I momentarily thought of Kemal from last year's big brother who kept branding someone a bully. a fucking bully
. I think he was embarassed. almost everyone hates him, he trusts me because i feel sorry for him sometimes. He doesn't have proper people skills and tries his best and i can empathise, i've tried to point out to him that it's the way he talks to people that irks them. he doesnt get it
. Yet, he had the audacity to bully me over MY Newspaper. Petty, it might seem but bullies are very sinister even with seemingly minor things
.He should watch out though, my brain is trigger-happy at the mo. one more thing from him...fuck knows!
He isn't the only person to try and bully me these days and I am pretty close to losing my rag. You see, I rant and rave here constantly
and i get pissed off. But it REALLY takes a lot for me to be pissed off but when i do, there is no going back and god help the culprits. Let's just say I almost reached that point yesterday but I got it under control eventually. sometimes you gotta save yourself for real wars and not minor battles:p.
As i felt my blood pressure soaring again, I sat down outside Southwark Cathedral and read another paper. Thought about a lot of issues and how to sort them out.I calmed myself down and eventually went home an hour later. I think the music wafting from inside the church was soothing. I could've gone in but decided against it.
Got home, washed my hair, soaked in the bath, scavenged for something to nibble on( steamed broccoli, cauliflower, carrots, a piece of grilled chicken) all washed down with water
I'm not getting on the scales again until next friday. One of my clients is trying to lose weight. she isn't eating much and scoffs on cakes in between. Her body, naturally has gone into starvation mode and she isn't losing any. I on the other hand am losing it and i'm not on a diet. It pisses her off at the same time she is concerned about me. I am meant to try and put on 3lbs by friday so i can look wholesome. I can't have everything hanging off my frame now can i? not at all me.
Oh, Deciever rang. out of the blue. Since i know the last 4 digits of his landline, i decided not to answer. He didn't leave a message. Why he rang, fuck knows but i've come a long way. a year ago i would've have had palpitations trying to answer. this time: slight irritation on a busy day then his friend rang. constantly. I answered. he was concerned about me.since i have been incommunicado, people seem to be concerned. I told him i'm fine
oh well, i'm still breathing. That's all one can do