After the blast from the past's text, i went off to visit a friend. I had an AP with the deceiver. It went suprisingly well. We chatted as he took a bath and then and continued to chat while he sat there naked. eventually he said he was going to bed was i coming. it was after midnight by then so i said yes. Remeber i did say i had a bucketful of cold water.
anwyay, we started watching some DVDs on his laptop, funny ones, when that was done, he started touching me, pulling me close to him and saying it had been a while since we were together. I told him" i am not what you want or what you need so lets not do this to ourselves". he asked what i was then, i said you tell me. he said you are here, and i said, aah the truth comes out. so he wants to shag, coz I am there. So we didn't. I really did not want to, there is too much stuff and between and since I know that he doesnt get up in the morning and think of me, that made it easier.

however we had a good time in the morning. trying to teach each other french and spanish, cuddling and that sort of think. he said he wanted me and that i must just give it up. I told him, he thinks he does but actually he doesn't. he did not pursue it, so u can see it was half-hearted attempts to try and see how far he could get.
Well, I am not playing those games anymore. I had a good time and I did not waver when it mattered most although it might have been easier just to capitulate and then cry later. More respect to me I say.

So I just returned from his place, yes did my walk of shame except this time There was no shame and it did not matter. something for him to ponder. I am actually glad this happened, I do believe I am truly over that whole thing, I might feel diffrently tomorrow, but I feel splendid right now.:p