Shit, it's been raining steadily since arly this morning. why on a day like this I ask you. the whole bloody week has been hot and now it looks like the weekend is going to be wet. If only I was in a position to be happy about this.

I could be in bed, indoors doing all kinds of licentious activities with someone I enjoy doing that with, but my particular reality dictates that I go outside or eslewhere to amuse myself.
Is that pathetic or what?! Mind you, I am not feeling sorry for myself, just pissed that it's pissing cats and dogs, although i havent seen any which makes me wonder where the expression comes from.

I am making a conscious decision to stop deluding myself about the deciever. I mean I never ever thought he was "the One" whatever that is(im getting cynical these days) but i guess I always wished he was nicer or more tender, or whatever other soppy shit! That is not the case, never will be.

Can someone come up with a remedy for switching feeling on and off, like erasing people and memories so they never bother us again? whoever said we are our own worst enemies....i want to slap them for being right.
its a friend's birthday today. she called last night, I will not be buying a prezzie coz I didnt know, but i few drinks will go down well, the we can gossip and get a move on.

Also I have decided to start running again. I want people to think im going to gym again when Im not, its better than worrying, cant have the blood pressure shooting up. They say only the good die young, and I still want to be bad...only a little.

cheers